The Backson Song

Lyrics from Winnie the Pooh

Owl, the Backson

[Owl:] It's a giant creature with a tail
Here, I'll draw Piglet in for scale
Its hide is like a shaggy rug
Its face a surly, ugly mug
With two sharp horns atop its head
Between a mop of hair that's red

And in its nose a ring of gold
That smells of monkey's feet and mold
Its toes are black
Its fur is blue
I swear that all I tell you is not made up

The Backson!

[All:] The Backson!

[Owl:] The Backson!

[All:] The Backson! Oh no!

[Pooh:] But, Owl, what does a Backson do?

[All:] Yes, Owl, what does a Backson do?

[Owl:] Hmm, what does a Backson do?
I'm thinking, I'm thinking, I'm thinking, I'm thinking, and now I will tell you

They sneak into your library and scribble in all your books

[All:] The Backson! The Backson! We don't like the Backson!

[Owl:] When decorating your Christmas tree, they tangle up all the hooks

[All:] The Backson! The Backson! We're afraid of the Backson!

[Owl:] They spoil the milk, they stop all the clocks, they use their horns to put holes in your socks

[All:] The Backson's the one who's been putting holes in our socks!

[Roo:] Tell us more about what Backsons do

[Tigger:] Yes, more about what Backsons do

[Owl:] More about what Backsons do? Why don't we hear some thoughts from you?

[Tigger:] Maybe they make ya sleep too late

[Owl:] Yes, yes, that's good, that's great

[Eeyore:] I bet they're the reason my tail is gone

[Owl:] You're on a roll; go on, go on!

[Rabbit:] They muddy up your tiny house

[Piglet:] They make you feel as small as a mouse

[Roo:] They break your crayons

[Rabbit:] They spill your tea

[Kanga:] They wake up babies at one and three

[Eeyore:] They made me catch the cold I caught

[Pooh:] They made me lose my train of thought

[Tigger:] They swipe your stripes

[Piglet:] They clog your pipes

[Rabbit:] They dig up your garden

[Eeyore:] They won't beg your pardon

[Pooh:] They eat your snacks

[Piglet:] They won't relax!

[Rabbit:] They chip your tooth

[Kanga:] They steal your youth

[Owl:] And now you know the horrible truth

[All:] The Backson! The Backson! The Backson! The Backson! Oh Noooooo!

[Rabbit:] Oh, yes
I know exactly what to do
We'll find things Backsons are partial to

[Pooh:] Like books

[Kanga:] And dishes

[Piglet:] And socks

[Roo:] And toys

[Rabbit:] Yes, everything that a Backson destroys
Then we'll dig an enormous pit and make the items lead to it
He'll fall in, and we'll get our friend

[Owl:] And this horrible nightmare can come to an end
The Backson!

[All:] The Backson!

[Owl:] The Backson!

[All:] The Backson!

[Owl:] Go home and search your closets; bring everything that you can

[All:] The Backson! The Backson! We're gonna catch the Backson!

[Owl:] We'll save Christopher Robin by following Rabbit's plan

[All:] The Backson! The Backson! We'll save Christopher Robin!

We must be brave and have no fear

[Owl:] Search to the death, we'll persevere

[All:] We'll search by the sun and the light of the moon, and if everything goes well
We'll be back soon!

[Owl:] Back soon?

[All:] Back soon

[Owl:] Sounds like Backson

[All:] Back soon

[Owl:] Oh, well, good luck everyone!

Lyrics transcribed by

Written by Robert Lopez and Kristen Anderson-Lopez
Performed by Craig Ferguson as Owl, with cast

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